How Moms Can Find Balance in the Chaos
Mind Body After Baby
Congratulations! You had a baby! Maybe you had your kiddo recently, or several years back; maybe you’re not the one who birthed your baby. What matters is, you had a baby and your life, body, mind and spirit will never be the same again!
Maybe that’s terrifying or depressing! Maybe it’s exciting or relieving! The range of healthy feelings about birth is vast. I know because I’ve been there…4 times! And I know because I work with growing families every day. As a doula, birth educator, and parenting coach, I connect with parents every step of the way, from conception to college, and here’s what I see all the time: they love their children so much it hurts…BUT the changes to their bodies, day-to-day lives, careers and energy can be SO hard. The realization that things will never be the same can be crushing. The impacts of children extend beyond the parent who gave birth, and beyond the postpartum period. If you feel like sleep deprivation, achiness from feeding and carrying your kids, nutritional depletion, brain fog and emotional rollercoasters are just the unavoidable way of parenting life, think again. I help parents every day realize, It doesn’t have to be that way!
If your life right now isn’t working, I bet you spend lots of time thinking of all the ways it stinks. I used to do that too! After my 4th baby, I felt completely trapped and defeated. I was so tired I could barely get out of bed and I was drowning in the demands of parenting. Forget about the possibility of having a rewarding career; that ship had sailed 3 kids ago! I felt ashamed of my body and I had a lot of pain from my birth. But, here are some hard truths: First, feeling victimized by your circumstances is the surest way to keep them the same. Second, a life of expansive happiness is possible for anyone! I am so proud of the work I did to get to the energized, connected and rewarding life I have today and I have devoted my career to sharing it with other parents and pregnant families! How? Here are my biggest tips to get started:
- View your obstacles as opportunities. Success begins in the mind, and an enlivening parenting life is no exception. Before you start to heal your body and lifestyle, you must first heal your mindset. Envision what you want, and believe it is possible, because it is!
- Balance your body. Parenting demands are more depleting than we realize. If you’re exhausted, can’t keep up with your kids, feel like you’re living in brain fog, carrying around excess weight, or struggling with milk supply, you may be nutritionally depleted. In my case, eating more frequently throughout the day and incorporating Isagenix into my meals made a huge difference. Everyone is different, but whatever you do, PLEASE don’t go on a calorie-restricting diet. Deprivation does not fix depletion.
- Modify your life. Things like work-home balance, self-care, exercise, personal pursuits, making time for relationships, shifting parenting techniques, etc. seem impossible when you’re in the dark place of negative focus and depletion. But, once you have a clear vision for yourself, and your nutrition and body chemistry is in balance, you can make the necessary changes to the rest of your life. Release yourself from guilt or shame when you need to make a change. Feeling guilt about your needs doesn’t make them go away.
My business and nutritional practices are deep and comprehensive vehicles for reaching a life of balance and joy. With these tools, you can happily face the reality that “It will never be the same again.” Instead of looking back with longing, you will be looking forward to the energized, balanced, and self-aware life that awaits you. You’ll never be the same, you’ll only get better!
About Our Guest Author Ann Kaplan:
Ann Kaplan is a birth doula, childbirth educator and founder of Mom-Me, a self-care program for parents. She has 4 children and has been supporting growing families since 2007, helping parents feeling overwhelmed or unsatisfied feel like themselves again. You can find her unique brand of ‘earnest sarcasm’ all over Facebook, in online programming, and around Denver, where she provides in-person workshops, coaching, classes and birth support. Her clients learn to approach parenthood with trust and authenticity and she LOVES seeing parents transform their lives and futures. You can learn more about her birth practice at DenverChildbirthClass.com and find out about upcoming parenting events at MomMeExperience.com